Watch Your Language
We’re not going to preach to you about have a few bottles during your downtime, but please, for the sake of your kids, try and keep your habits as far away from them as possible. They’ll learn soon enough about the bad things of the world without you exposing them to it at an early age.
But if you are going to get buzzed, make sure your kids are out of view and in earshot of what you’re going to slur out. Kids pick up on new words pretty quickly, and the last thing you want is for them to parade around the neighborhood, chanting a new swear word they learned from you. Better they learn it somewhere else.
Another Pro Tip: Don’t Teach Them About Disney World
Do you know how expensive it is to vacation at Disney World? Not only do you have to spend a zillion dollars on travel and accommodation, but you’ll also need to spend a small fortune on admission tickets. Then, the jerks at Disney World try to upsell by offering all sorts of ridiculous packages at exorbitant costs.
It would all be worth it if your kids appreciated how much you spent but nope. They would rather stay at home and watch Toy Story 4 for the umpteenth time. Wood is right there, but they want the animated version of him, not some guy in a costume. $8,000 well-spent.